moisten a cotton ball the size of the moon
then apply to the body by swimming
backstroke across the cottony surface
(check your local tide schedule)
next clip your nose, close your eyes
and repeat with butterfly stroke
air dry naked on a large rock
in a desert canyon turning slowly
against the adiabatic winds
(caution: a slight tingling of the skin
may occur as the temperature drops
on a clear desert night)
rub yourself briskly and stay alert
do not use witch hazel if you
can't swim or are clumsy
side effects may include dishevelment,
a false confidence in your singing voice,
inability to remember trigonometry
and feelings that you are being watched
by a hungry mountain lion (you may be!)
if symptoms persist
consult your shaman
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